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New year - let's STOP Domestic Violence together

1/2/2015

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Follow us -

www.domesticviolenceunmaskedinc.com

Twitter - @dvunmasked

Instagram - @dvunmasked

Facebook - domestic violence unmasked, inc.

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Website Address Change - Please update

11/13/2014

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This is just to inform you that our website name has been updated.  Please update your information too.
Please share the website also.  Your help is so important in getting the information out there.

Thank you all very much.

www.domesticviolenceunmaskedinc.com

John 3:16


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We need your stories - Please share them

10/28/2014

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We need your stories.  I am writing a book about women's true stories of abuse.  We will be using this book in our program of educating women and young ladies about DV.

Our goal is that women and young ladies around the world will one day have a copy. We already have a connection of someone who is willing to translate the book in their country. We pray
that the book will help others who are suffering and need help.

Sharing your story, will help others to understand what they are going through, and that it is not something that they are doing alone.  That there are many suffering.  They may not personally be in a DV relationship, but may know someone who is and can guide them to safety or direct them to help. This secret about domestic violence is a big secret, that many share and it has to be talked about. 

Will YOU help us??

The women may be embarrassed, scared, or maybe they don't even realize that they are in an abusive relationship. They believe their love for their abuser, will make them change. Maybe they have been told that they are not worth anything, and that no one will ever love them, over and over.  So this is the best they have.  So, why try and leave.  He may have also said, he will kill you if you do leave or he would take the kids and you would never see them again.

Help them, please.  Share your story.  I know there are many of you reading this and saying, I don't
want to remember that time in my life.  To painful, or I am embarrassed that I even was in that
relationship.  Or maybe you are still in a DV relationship and you ask yourself, how can I help?

If you are in danger or need some answers, please call 1-800-799-7233 (safe)  National Domestic Violence Hotline.  Make sure you call it on a safe telephone.  Maybe a friends cell phone or from work.

By you sharing your story, you will help someone, and we then pray that they seek outside
help, and find safety.

PLEASE.... can you share your story.  If you do, please change the names of people and locations
for safety for you and/or your children.

Please email your stories to us at nomoreviolence14@aol.com

Share what your relationship was like before the abuse started, during and after. 
What signs you saw, but ignored.  But, you see now that they were red flags.  Maybe the abuse didn't start till years later.  Tell us when it first started.  How it progressed.  How you changed too.  Maybe your details will help wake someone from the deepest part of her life, that she is hiding in.

Explain the details of the abuse.  Was it physical, verbal, mental, emotional or/and spiritual?
Was it all or one type?
 
Explain, how you left.  What you did to prepare yourself?  When did you realize you were
in an abusive relationship?

Remember, the details will help those who are questioning their new relationship or their long term relationship.

If you have any questions, please don't hesistate to ask us.  We want to thank you for your stories,
your prayers, and your blessings.

God knows and is right there by your side.

-Domestic Violence UnMasked, Inc

John 3:16





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comfort

10/28/2014

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Comfort for Women from God’s word.

-Bible study BRAVE (Angela Thomas)

The Lord says to us today…

Do you know who I am?

I am the God of all comfort. As a Mother comforts her child,

So will I comfort you.


My love is as tender and true


As a Mothers’ comfort.

I want you to believe in me

… and rest in the gentle peace

I can give to you.


My peace is different than this world peace.


Do not let your heart be troubled or afraid.

Remember who I am and believe in my character.

I am the one who gives comfort to all.

  Have you forgotten who stretched out the

Heavens and laid the foundation of the earths?

  I love you so much that I sent my son Jesus

To show you how to believe in who I am.

I have anointed him to heal your broken heart.

  To release sinners from their bondage

And to comfort all who mourn.

 
I have seen your sin, but I have sent Jesus

To heal you of your ways.

To make your heart clean and to

Restore comfort to your soul.

  
His love is big, deep, wide and high.

So my comfort will reach even you.

I am the God who comforts the down cast,

And I am not far off – I do not come and go.


You are not alone on this earth.


I am ever present, never leaving,

Never failing.

 

I have also sent the comforter, who is The Holy Spirit. 

He is with you always.

This comforter will teach you spiritual things,

And keep reminding you, of who I am.

 

I am your comfort on every side. My comfort will calm your anxiety and bring

Joy to your soul.

  Let the love of Jesus come to you

And bring in every lasting comfort to you.

  And from that comfort let your heart be encouraged

And your life be strengthened for every good word

And work that I have planned for you.

  Rely on me and then give, what I have given to you.

Comfort someone else with the comfort you have received from me.

  My plans for you are good, and in all these things,

I will receive the glory, because you are my beloved.

… and I am your comfort, forever and ever.

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Strength ONLY from Jesus -                                               Don't pass the posts, someone may be searching for help!!                      Will you HELP?

10/25/2014

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One of the hardest things you may find as you are in the midst of the torment of abuse, or trying to escape, is that there will be people that will turn the other way. 

Maybe a friend, stops hanging with you.  You find out a few years later that she couldn't be around you, because it reminded her of the abusive relationship that she was in.  Maybe you find some family members blaming you instead.  Just something as simple as, what did you do, to make him mad? The words, you hear your abuser saying all the time.  You are not worth the beat of your heart. Then you might have family that do not feel safe, if you stay with them, as you were trying to escape from the abuser. So, you need to find a place on your own now.  What about neighbors in a house apartment hearing you scream for help, and then you find out years later, they could hear you scream, they could hear your body banging against the walls as you scream for help and violent words  being yelled at you, but tell you that they didn't want to get in the middle of your argument. What about in your own Church.  They knew what was happening, and how scared you and your kids were.  You may even had run to their home for safety.  But, in the end, they turned the other way and said they didn't know that was happening.  

Who or What do you reach for at times as these?  From my beating heart, I am telling you - JESUS is the only one, who wont leave you.  I know it may be hard to understand, because HE isn't a solid body, standing in front of you, with open arms, saying it is safe here.  I have you.  Don't be scared.  But, with every part of my being... HE is there, and HE will protect you and HE will give you strength you never thought you had.  HE made you and HE knows you are stronger than you feel right now, believe me, you will stand taller than ever before.

Trust me..... trust HIM.  God loves you then and now and every other moment in between.

As we post the true stories of women, (part or entire stories), I wonder who passes up reading them.  Afraid it will remind them of their abusive life, that they are in.  Or because you may know a loved one suffering from an abusive relationship, and just can't and you turn away.
 
I pray you find the courage to read each of the posts, and you share them on your page.  We can do small steps, but together we can do great things.  Will you help us?  STOP Domestic Violence!!  UnMask the secret.

1800-799-7233 (SAFE) National Domestic Violence Hotline (call from a safe place, like someone's cell phone, or maybe work.

- Domestic Violence UnMasked, Inc.

John 3:16

16: For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should
not perish, but have everlasting life.
 

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1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) National DV Hotline #

10/23/2014

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1-800-799-7233 (SAFE)  This is the National Domestic Violence Hotline Number.  If you are any where in the United States, you can call them.  There is NO charge for that call.  Please make sure you call that number from a safe place.  Maybe your work place, a friends cell phone or maybe a pay phone.

I say this, because if your abuser is monitoring your calls, he can dial last call and see who
you have called.  Be careful.  Safety first.  Planning is important for your safety and your children's
safety.

- Domestic Violence UnMasked, Inc.

John 3:16



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KNOW WHO YOU ARE DATING.

10/22/2014

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If you could tell your younger self all the secrets you know now.... would you??  OF COURSE!!!
We would do anything, not to suffer the pain we have suffered.  Yes, all that suffering has made us
stronger, wiser and able to help others going through it now.  But, we still would have preferred not
to have gone through it. 

Since we did... here are some big words of wisdom.  Since we can't really go back and sit with
our younger self and have this really important conversation.  Lets have the conversation with our daughters and sons.
Maybe your kids, friends.  Youth group kids.  It's time to STOP Domestic Violence.  So lets STOP it, before it starts.
1 of 3 women are abused in their life time, by someone close to them. (Spouse, boyfriend, family member)

1.  Any red flags - does he lie, cheat, do drugs or drinks. (abusers don't become abusers because they are drunk
or on drugs.  Many will abuse without any self medicating.)  You deserve better. Follow your instinct. 
It is usually 99 % right.
2.  Do you make excuses for his behavior or actions.
3.  Does he put you down, say negative things.  Does he respect your boundaries?
4.  IMPORTANT - how do they treat the people in their life?  Are they sarcastic, talk bad about them?
5.  How do they handle their personal life.  Are they responsible?  Are they responsible with money?
6.  Do they care for others?  How do they treat animals?
7.  The most IMPORTANT thing...  Do they have God part of their life?  It is not a matter of knowing the words
 in the  Bible, but how they live their lives, that will show you, if they truly know what Jesus says in the Bible.

You don't want to date and then marry someone you think will be ok.  No matter HOW MUCH YOU LOVE HIM. You have to
step back and look deeper into the reason of the relationship. If God's plan for your life, is to marry, than HE
has someone pretty amazing.  You may have to wait for him.  But, isn't it worth the wait, then to go through any
form of abuse.  Enjoy that journey of singleness. Let GOD fill your heart.

You deserve a love, like Jesus loved the Church. 

- Domestic Violence UnMasked, Inc.




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The Circle of Domestic Violence

10/19/2014

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You find yourself lost in this dark and scary place.  This place is your life. You don't know who to turn to,
because you feel stupid, weak, lonely, ugly, and extremely terrified.  No one will understand why you would
stay with someone who treats you like your a pile of poop. You are better than that.  Why do you stay?? Is the
million dollar question.

Then you find yourself, explaining the answer. 
He loves me. He doesn't mean to do what he does.  He was in a bad mood that day.  He told me he was sorry,
and maybe even that day, I got some beautiful flowers and a nice phone call or text. I love him.  He will stop
one day.

The lies keep coming, and the words that you are not worthy, are heard over and over.  The put downs, the
jokes that are not funny to you.  Actually they hurt your feelings.  You hear this voice in your head telling
you, that your feelings do not matter. You should just deal with it.  Get over it.  It's just a joke. 
I didn't mean what I said, or you just are too serious.  Laugh a little. You can't take a joke.  These words are
repeated over and over.  You start to believe them or maybe it just becomes your normal.

Maybe you experience financial abuse.  He controls all the money and even fills your car, so he knows exactly
how much you have and checks your mileage too, to monitor you.

There are the times when you find yourself, with no friends, because he wont let you see them.  Some how it
has even gotten to the point, you can't even make a phone call, without his permission or contolling the phone. 
The controlling is all around you.  You can't breathe and you feel like you are dieing inside, a little everday.

Then of course, there is the definition of domestic violence, the physical abuse.  This is the main definition of DV.
(which it is not - it is just easier to prove then the other types).  Maybe he just pushes you, grabs your arm tight. 
Peole don't see the bruising from the outside.  It's not the punch in the eye, black eye.  It's hidden, so
the world can't see.  And you dare not tell anyone, because he knows how to lie about it and people believe it.
Or even worse, people turn the other way and shut their ears and eyes.

Now this is the toughest... you have children.  You try and hide the behavior from them.  But, the kids see it and either
start acting the same way, out of their own anger towards the circumstances or because they see it to be a normal
behavior.  They lie, they yell, say terrible things, to each other and also to the mother.  They act out in school, in
their community or their jobs.  Their behavior is being repeated, mimicked.  You thought you were doing your best
covering it up, sending them to their rooms, so they wouldn't hear and see anything.  But, they did. 

The truth.... I love to laugh, just not when the joke is made about me, my kids, or anyone, in a put down, cruel way.
I want to feel beautiful. God made me perfect.  He doesn't make any mistakes.  I want to trust, but how do
I do that, when all I hear are lies.  You want to have freedom again. Not be scared anymore.

It has to STOP.  How do you get off this ride, you are on.  A circle that has no end. It's sweet love, then
fighting, maybe then physical fighting, he apologizes... I wont do that again, or even worse .... not even
admitting the wrong that was done.  Instead, blaming you for his acting out, anger or just because you made
him do it.  Then it all better again.  You believe he will stop, he tells you how sorry he is.
What is the truth? Do YOU want off the ride NOW?

When does it stop.  When do you face your fear and trust that you are worthy
and a loving person.  Your children need a safe place.  Today, now.... draw the line in the sand and STOP the cycle.

Domestic Violence is a circle, a ride you don't want to be on.  If anything like this sounds familiar, please reach out
1-800-799-7233 (safe)  National Domestic Violence Hotline.  Talk to someone.  Be safe when you call.  Call from a
friends phone or at work, where he can't monitor your call. Reach out!

-Domestic Violence UnMasked, Inc.

Always Praying for your safety!  Trust God!


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Smile - Light the way!!

10/17/2014

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A smile can change someone's heart. Share one today.... Everyday. You don't know what is hiding behind their mask. When we loose trust, it is hard to trust anyone. Your thoughts are filled with doubt and fear and confusion and self doubt. The pit we fall into sometimes doesn't see light. Ladies, we need to be the light for our sisters. Show the smile, and kind word. Show how to trust again. God will help you light the way. Make a SMILE moment last the entire day! - Domestic Violence Unmasked Inc
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October 17th, 2014

10/17/2014

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Thank you so much for having Domestic Violence UnMasked Inc. on the show. We enjoyed sharing Gods love for the world and the passion HE has placed on our hearts to reach out to so many.

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